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Ragga boi.

Ragga boi.
Bad guy somebori

Tuesday 28 October 2008

Naked potopoto

So Invisible Inspired this.

I cant exactly stand the reccession in blogsville either, whats happnin to us guys?

you need to read invisibles post its hilarious. makes me wanna say;

My friends had been goin on and on about some strip clubs in gidi, I had never been and being a gbeborun, inquisitive somebody I had been making noise in their ears about how I wanted to follow, why didnt they take me before?

That particular friday we had a gig to be at but got bored early into it. I was sooo mad as in after getting dressed to go out the tin don dey dull like that kin 12. the next thing was to go home and sleep abi? naw! my boys had a better idea.

So we get there and Im the only girl with like 5 boys, luckily as usual Im all dressed up like one of em so nothing like anyone mistaking me for a hustler...or so I thought.

We pay to get in and almost immediately Im engulfed by all the smoke, that place was darn hot, too may people in one room, suffocating.

it must have been the suffocation that made me want to pee cuz I had to go and I had to go fast. the toilet was descpicable but meen I have seen worse.

I get out and I cant find my boys ALL FIVE OF EM! AH! mo gbe. I whip out my phone and Im calling when this drunk ass,halitosis harborin, native and cap wearing, ugly as fork, cousin of Gollum bitch ass morafoka walks to me and tries to pull my arm, Ol boy me sef fear from the bad eye wey I give am, he's still trying to touch me, I muster ALL the phonee in my body to tell him that if he touches me, he will die. ol boy na so the guy start tell me sey im be counsellor for im constintuency as in ewwww what the fork! luckily for me, one of the boys came back to get me.

the show was eww, ,at that point two girls were supposed to be doing a 69 on stage with a dildo but it was ewww, they had no idea! they were faking it as in the expressions on their faces was dumb. ugly ass girls dey waka with white bra and pant talk sey na bikini, there was even one that looked 4 months to due date and had local tattoos of coconut trees on her stomach, I was distressed.

there was now one multiheterosexual, bisexual, monosexual girl there, ol boy the girl was sick! a customer, she was getting a lap dance from a stripper, slapping the asses of any stripper that dared walk past, getting her boobs sucked from the guy she came there with, putting her flashlight in the strippers ass, sucking another strippers boobs, it was a sight! at first I dey shy to look but I noticed one of my boys had turned his chair and was looking at them full, when I pulled him, he told me say na strip club, if dem no wan make person see them dem go do am for house.

like all that wasnt enough the idiotic Dj kept on playing Whitney's your love is my love and kept on going back on ''If tomorow was judgement day" odikwa very unfunny, I was thinking if rapture should come NOW, wetin I for talk? this place no worth am naa.

the coconut bearing girl now had one baba mufutau oko Iya basira look alike customer, following her up and down, as in they would go to the corner and he would proceed to squeezing the living day lights out of her breasts, the guy had this nackson look, it was disgusting. after the dance she would now wear her payint back right there and then. HA!

It was upsetting, that my first trip to a strip club woulda been such a disaster as in NOT ONE of the girls was fine, NOT ONE! mo fe le ma sunkun.

we left there disgusted as in even the guys were disgusted, straight home to sleep and try to block the omages from my mind.

potopoto, yanmayanma girls.

32 comments:

Rayo said...

ewwwww, ewwwww nd ewwwwww. pele oh, not a nice first experience at all

miz-cynic said...

day me i went to tht same strip club they still had a coupla o.k girls...im sure the standards are declining.pele dear! its real sodom and gomorrah

Invisible said...

FIRST!! Oh sheet, your freaking moderation. I better be first.

You did NOT go to a strip club, you went to the real jungle. That one na porn house.
The one I went to, no sex anything o. Besides the fact that it was against the law to touch, the place was an upscale place so everyone was respectable.
LMAO on the counselor dude.

bumight said...

are you sure you guys went to a strip club not a porn shooting? loL!

aloted said...

true true...rapture no suppose meet somebody in this kain place o...kai

ShonaVixen said...

gurl i really dont wish i was there...sorry o!
Lol @ the dj repeating 'if tomorrow was judgement day'..err he wouldnt be excluded now just becoz he's playing that song o!!Foolish dj!!
My first time wasnt that disastrous..besides the girls just whipping out their boobies whilst we was trying to have dinner (yes o, we went there to watch the show and eat some food for a friend's bday)..

Rebirth said...

disgusting place!!!! which kain strip club is that one o????????? who picked the place???????/ ive never been to one but im sure there r some better ones......... more luck if u ever go again

Tigeress said...

lol. pele.

Naija Idol said...

guess it was overhyped. isnt it d one at opebi or wherever?????

This club pass porno shoot. r u sure they werent filming??????

exschoolnerd said...

looooooooooooooooooooooooool

iyama!!! i cn almost imagine!!!

id just be vommiting if i was dere..

lol @ "if 2mrw is judgement day" is dat even an appropraite strip joint song...

Anonymous said...

yebariba samboribo..that one done pass me

kai

zephi

Shubby Doo said...

lol @ potatoe yanma yanma girls

lmao @ 'drunk ass,halitosis harborin, native and cap wearing, ugly as fork, cousin of Gollum bitch ass morafoka'...see how u yab man pikin

badder you have it all wrong...go with your girlfriends to see male strippers...i'm considering the visit to the chippendales 4 my bday...if we go it will be my bonus present!!! ;-)

Cappuccine Baby said...

lmao you were at a strip club and you were thinking about rapture!? buahahahahaha you have killed me!

~Sirius~ said...

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!
what a nasty experience trying hard strippers, now that's a 1st, why did they bother anyways? Naija, must we copy!
Ha! your guys now bailed out on you leaving you to view all that nan-sense and that Dj should be shot! ewwwwww!

N.I.M.M.O said...

Chica why you dey complain now? No be you wan see wetin ya eye never see before?

But seriously yur descriptions were spot on. Even the insults.

Are you sure they were not filming? thats a risk you take for going to such places o. Anyway, if your local government councilor was there sha, then nothing do you.

Anonymous said...

dats a bad first experience mehn... lol

haba, tattoos of coconut trees?dats a first!hehe

NikkiSab said...

YUK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ibiluv said...

i sooooooooo wanna go to a strip joint......i may not like the experience but i wan take my eye see.........

Tyger said...

lmao rolling on the floor takiti
i cant believe this

white pant and bra in strip club
baba mufu oko iya basira!
potopoto yanmayanma girls!

you are hilarious!

what a way to discover strip clubs

I am still laffing!

Jaguda said...

ki lo chele. lol @ d potopoto naked ladies

Smaragd said...

Rolling Ont the Floor Laffing My Ass off! u are the funniest badder!

I had to write that out in full cuz meen... ur description ehn... tew bad!

lmao

and the music they were playing? classical!

Naapali said...

"this drunk ass,halitosis harborin, native and cap wearing, ugly as fork, cousin of Gollum bitch ass morafoka"

- it was worth it just for the inspiration behind that line.

- the whole thing does sound like a rather eeeew inspiring ordeal.

Anonymous said...

You this woman sef, you will not kill person with laughter. ha! That was sooo funny! WOW! Didnt even know we had strip clubs in Naija! But that was so fuunny.

Parakeet said...

Double YUCK! I bet you wont be going back there.

poeticallytinted said...

LMAO. But omo, that must have hurt!

Jaja said...

No reccession baby

we is back!!

And for your story hmmmmm... i will send u questionaaire

ebonyhyde said...

dat one funny no b small,can u imagin how u go wear bra and pant call am bikini,abeg d discription is very disgustin bliv me i would'nt wanna b dere for anytin in d world.

Buttercup said...

LMFAO!!!!! Im sure u wont be goin anywhere near a strip club anytime soon...LOL @ the dj playin 'your love is my love'!

How u been? Been a while!

InCogNaija said...

omo, i laff sotay, i bend!! rotflmfbao! OMG!
Nasty strip clubs have never been the rage except for nasty ass pple too.
Your description of baba chairman that wanted to grab you was just mad. lol! painted a pictur of frodo looking gut with puss filled boils all over him...am i close? lol!
and they wer having sex all around you? thats some red light district shit. i actually kindda feel bad for you and your friends. e pele.
If i ever had the ill-fortune of finding myself in one of such places, i will swear off strip clubs, but in the mean time, as i still dey jam correct ones...Omo paro lo jare. I cant shout!

Stuck in my throat said...

LOL!!and I thot my experience was bad.LOL!!

Tyrex said...

Hi badderchic, stumbled over Ur blog...nice one followed from ubongda's, ehm...just updated might wanna check mine, got zero traffic at the moment

princesa said...

Hehe he he he he
Naked potopoto indeed!

Babe r u sure its the same stip club i went too?
At least there i saw a few fine gals.