Naked potopoto

So Invisible Inspired this.

I cant exactly stand the reccession in blogsville either, whats happnin to us guys?

you need to read invisibles post its hilarious. makes me wanna say;

My friends had been goin on and on about some strip clubs in gidi, I had never been and being a gbeborun, inquisitive somebody I had been making noise in their ears about how I wanted to follow, why didnt they take me before?

That particular friday we had a gig to be at but got bored early into it. I was sooo mad as in after getting dressed to go out the tin don dey dull like that kin 12. the next thing was to go home and sleep abi? naw! my boys had a better idea.

So we get there and Im the only girl with like 5 boys, luckily as usual Im all dressed up like one of em so nothing like anyone mistaking me for a hustler...or so I thought.

We pay to get in and almost immediately Im engulfed by all the smoke, that place was darn hot, too may people in one room, suffocating.

it must have been the suffocation that made me want to pee cuz I had to go and I had to go fast. the toilet was descpicable but meen I have seen worse.

I get out and I cant find my boys ALL FIVE OF EM! AH! mo gbe. I whip out my phone and Im calling when this drunk ass,halitosis harborin, native and cap wearing, ugly as fork, cousin of Gollum bitch ass morafoka walks to me and tries to pull my arm, Ol boy me sef fear from the bad eye wey I give am, he's still trying to touch me, I muster ALL the phonee in my body to tell him that if he touches me, he will die. ol boy na so the guy start tell me sey im be counsellor for im constintuency as in ewwww what the fork! luckily for me, one of the boys came back to get me.

the show was eww, ,at that point two girls were supposed to be doing a 69 on stage with a dildo but it was ewww, they had no idea! they were faking it as in the expressions on their faces was dumb. ugly ass girls dey waka with white bra and pant talk sey na bikini, there was even one that looked 4 months to due date and had local tattoos of coconut trees on her stomach, I was distressed.

there was now one multiheterosexual, bisexual, monosexual girl there, ol boy the girl was sick! a customer, she was getting a lap dance from a stripper, slapping the asses of any stripper that dared walk past, getting her boobs sucked from the guy she came there with, putting her flashlight in the strippers ass, sucking another strippers boobs, it was a sight! at first I dey shy to look but I noticed one of my boys had turned his chair and was looking at them full, when I pulled him, he told me say na strip club, if dem no wan make person see them dem go do am for house.

like all that wasnt enough the idiotic Dj kept on playing Whitney's your love is my love and kept on going back on ''If tomorow was judgement day" odikwa very unfunny, I was thinking if rapture should come NOW, wetin I for talk? this place no worth am naa.

the coconut bearing girl now had one baba mufutau oko Iya basira look alike customer, following her up and down, as in they would go to the corner and he would proceed to squeezing the living day lights out of her breasts, the guy had this nackson look, it was disgusting. after the dance she would now wear her payint back right there and then. HA!

It was upsetting, that my first trip to a strip club woulda been such a disaster as in NOT ONE of the girls was fine, NOT ONE! mo fe le ma sunkun.

we left there disgusted as in even the guys were disgusted, straight home to sleep and try to block the omages from my mind.

potopoto, yanmayanma girls.

Truth be told...

My Personal peoples,

Blogsville, I don miss una gaaaan!

unfortunately I might not have beeg entirely honest...WAIT! dont take away my honest blogger award just yet.

I havent blogged in a bit not because I still been feeling the blues...nah! Ive been mad busy. Yes I have been feeling better just being too busy to blog as in belee that. By not bogging I just might have given you the impression I was still feeling down and thats not true. ema binu! lol

NAAAAPAAAALI!

I am stunned, put up a post just becos of me? I waas feeling every inch of a princess. thank you for all em birthday wishes it was a blast guys, ill give you the jist a lil bit.

TRUTH BE TOLD...

I learnt a couple of years ago that when it comes to man and woman matter the best thing to do is MIND MY FORKING BUSINESS so guys I wonder...is this one of those times? errrrm HELL YE! theres so much to say, so little time by the way mz Dee I miss you o! you too invisible and Afro.

well the situation on ground is that...

Friend A and Friend B are my friends but they dont know each other. Ive known friend B longer but Im closer to friend A well, friend A tells me last week that she forked friend A's Brother in law. i.e Friend B's sisters husband. (she met the guy randomly)

I HAVE NO IDEA WHY SHE DUNNIT honestly guys, like Mario I dont wanna know as in I cant start to imagine why but as for me and my house we shall mind our business. how the hell am I supposed to say it

"errm friend B, you know that my friend A? that Im always talking about? well she been balling your nephews daddy...hehehehe" olorun maje abi pples wat do you think?

on the other hand TRUTH BE TOLD why does sex have to be so complicated? is it so difficult to understand sometimes that I just wanna fork you?

I lost a good friend of mine just cuz we forked I mean, its not mine fault, he decided to take a walk, dunno wassup with him on the inside, he prob thinks Im gonna get clingy and sheet but dude "I just felt like it and you was there so we dunnit! does it have to be so complicated?"

TRUTH BE TOLD

I met baldy a couple of weeks ago, Lordy lordy lordy he soooooooooo sexy but erm...I just want to fork him. well that makes two of us! hehehehe

baldy starts to piss me off with the "we cant get emotional and sheet" sturvs even after we had agreed on our 'arrangement' trust me and my big mouth i told him

"baldy, I dont want to marry you, dayyum, I dont even want to be your girlfriend, I just want to fork you! is that sooooo difficult to comprehend?"

lol. I really did say it, over the phone, in front of my born again older cousin, i reckon her mouth stayed open for days. lol

TRUTH BE TOLD

there is someone I do want to date and get emotional with but errm you know how it is, I dey fear to tell am lol. I have desisted from keeping his number and I look forward to seeing him once every two weeks whenever I do a meet with our circle of friends, then I go all mushy and stuff ater which I forget him or at least try. lol

EWOOOOOOOOO from I dont have time to a semi long post lol. hope I have satisfied y'all, Im still reppin abi?

Bloggers All, I miss and love you guys and errm spread the word...

THE BAD'CHAIRLADY IS BACK!

All those are born in October stand up stand up!

For starters, I'm grateful for the calls, text messages and mails.

I'm grateful for the comments, the words of advice, I'm grateful for them all.

Last year, I sat in my room, the eve of my birthday, sad. midnight I started to cry as though I was an egbere (those mythical creatures that are said to crfy once you take their mats which supposedly supply wealth to the taker of the mat or somin of the sort) I cried till my eyes were bloodshot (take note Im not a crying person usually)

it seemed everything was wrong, all my plans, you know the ones that I made when I was sixteen? well they weren't going according to book, I wasn't married, didn't have no kid, my career wasn't where I wanted it to be couldn't afford a trip on my own, couldn't as much as do half the things I had thought I could do. My friend called, the one whom in my previous post I said has relocated? well he called and told me

"Bad, you be fool! wetin dey cry you? you never marry so?

you no get pikin so? ehn you no get the kin money wey you want and so diafore?

you dey hung? you no get cloth? okay you no get your own personal motor, you dey waka?no be cab you dey enter? your padis no dey carry you? I say you be fool.
na water plenty for ya eye, you no know wetin dey do you. needless to say I believed him and stopped crying but at the back of my mind I know what was going on there.

Happy Birthday to me I thought and wept some more.

later in the day I had a real reason to cry. you see last year I spent the day in a home in my neighbourhood, I saw children not up to a year old who didn't have hands, feet, who couldnt talk, crawl let alone stand, they had done nothing to no one yet they suffered so much so so much pain...I truly was a fool. babies whose mothers had discarded them like garbage, who hadnt been given a chance...I mean call me fool again.

me wey don fork fork fork, abuse abuse abuse, tif meat for pot, seduce man, coveted my neighbors convertible, said "I swear to God" me wey don lie "Im in London when i truly was in Osapa London, na so dem dey roam phone? me wey don fight my momsie tire, me who had said it wasnt me when truly it was, Me who had worked on the sabbath, place less important things before he who is all knowing, me wey dey watch people fight add salt and pepper join "EHN! did you hear what he said? if na me I go SLAP AM!" me the sinner.

God had blessed me in short over blessed me and yet I was still sad, everybody dont call me Timaya or badder call me fool!"

even as I sit in the same spot as I was last year, with the same situations as in I trip e be like say I'm in pause mode, even as I stay here wondering and getting close to tears again as to when stuff will move for me, I kneel and sing thank you Lord, I really am blessed beyond measure, I might not have it all but I have him!

My birthday comes a day after Naapali's, in exactly 10days, I am not excited as I used to be as a child but lord knows I am grateful, no matter what I face ESPECIALLY when trouble comes my way I will praise the lord.

So Naapali...all those are born in October, Stand up, Stand up!

Dear Dr Naapali...

Dearest Doctor Naapali,


You always have been a deep person,

this is me writing...searching for advice, asking you to please tell me It will be okay.

okay I know it would be okay but...

I really am not myself,

I feel as though my life is in pause mode, I'm not moving forward, not moving backward...at least that's the way I feel.

Naapali, I'm losing my friends.

well not exactly,its not like they are dying or saying they don't want to be friends with me again or anything you see Ola is relocating to America this Saturday, we used to hang out alot.

friend of mine has returned to his home...IN ANOTHER STATE,we used to hang out alot too.

one of my closest aburos left home to go school in Jand, she hasnt even deemed it fit to call me...is she having that much fun? (we used to hang out alot 3)

I feel as though I'm about to lose friend no1. will we still hang out alot?

Al is my newest friend, he needs me to be his friend right now, I cannot afford to be weak.

But I am.

very weak.

I read my Bible everyday, I pray to God for strength. I listened to Sam Adeyemi Preach, he is wonderful by the way. he said little that went a looong way. I believed...I believe, I have faith but I am still so weak.

tell me Doctor, what happens when you are not loved as you should, as you believe you should, as you want to?

I feel as though something is coming, anticipating it, I don't want to be dissapointed.

Dear Naapali,

I'm hurting. I want to cry, I want to be held.

I need Jesus, I have him, but I want him some more. only him can save me now.

will money solve my problems? I don't think so I mean, I'm not entirely broke, moreover the best things in life are free ainnit?

Naapali, I have been busy, very busy working on a project, I'm not getting paid for it no but at least I don't get to think about God knows what it is I think about.
and when I'm working I actually smile. When I'm not working, when I'm alone, I am actually not smiling.


Smile down on me lord, I hate these times in my life, I really really do.

I didn't even respond to all the comments on my last post, (guys ema binu your comments used to make my day)


Doctor, perhaps I need to be quiet for a while, maybe I need to search deeper. Maybe alot of things.

peoples, I might not be doing my blog rounds but I will be approving my comments daily. Thank you for being there for me.


Dear Doctor, my blog family, friends...Me sef tire!

Me being honest.

I hate Facebook,

yet I spend the better part of my days there. it is soooo frustrating!

pictures, people having fun.

this one getting married, that one having a baby, the most unlikely people getting engaged...why not me? do they possess ori meji? (two heads)

honestly I am happy for them, really really am but wadafork! why d hell am I d one that puts up pictures of...shoes? okay I didn't quite do that, but I'm so close to.

OKay Mo says to thank God constantly, I do how can I not, baba loke is always on point but...ehn

I'm still hating facebook.

I don't mean to sound funny but blogsville is more the place for me, nobody is forming happy here, if you are happy, you are happy, if you are sad, then it is so, for that Fb ehn, e be like say I go go rent man. lol

I love blogsville and I love the people in it, even though I only know a handful one on one, I still love y'all. I feel like I known y'all forever.









thank you for my honesty award from Mz Dee and Ibiluv, I shock say na only 2 pple give me, norin do una I still love you.

I'm gonna do somin funny and pass my award to the unlikely pips so I hereby Tag...

1. Porter d Harcourt
2. Ubong Da Randy
3. Jaja
4. NImmo
5. Unshined Congo
6. Cally Waffy Babe
7. Baba Alaye
8. Yosh
9. Zephi
10. Unnaked

those days when I was unknown in blogsville and I used to get 7-8 comments...they came from you.

half of you have quit blogging but you still a part of the family.

I miss una gaaaan!

this has got to be my shortest post in a while.

Phone Pollution

"trying to sleep and wondering what to do with this hard on I get whenever I think of you,
wish I had your freshly washed poosy in my mouth with you kneeling on my face
with your legs spread out wide...me eating."

Laaro kutukutu Monday! actually, he prob sent the text last night but I turned my phone off hence gettin it this morning. Na wa o!

ordinarily, I would be excited

ordinarily my possy lips would twitch and spew forth liquids, so much I would need to wash off or/and change my panties "(and I soo hate washing off valuable poosy juice)

but nah, I looked at it, sighed and shut my phone, got better things t o do...like BLOG!

He's really nice and all but I'm incapable of feeling that or almost anything for him, what did you call me now Red Sapphire? Mushy? sorry. though I stripped the post (the tin wanted to finish my career), I know whats in My mind and it prob should have stayed there. Geisha SHARRAP! dont even breathe! lol.

I might have it misconstrued but I know for a fact that even if things do go as I have dared imagine (even for a split sec) God has his plans for us all and we go laff about all this in d future. in the mean time, I know I have a somebory that genuinely cares about me. end of story.

seriously though

I THINK EVERYBODY WANTS TO FORK ME; well not exactly everybody but a whole lot of people do, guys and girls alike...DISGUSTING? riiight!

I mean,take txt guy for instance, at some point in my life I really liked him, problem is I don't feel that strongly about him. I have asked him to stop sendin em msgs but he's stubborn. I dont really mind cuz asides him bein silly we really are good friends so let him text all he wants, his bizness.

problem is, if somebody is sending me those? I want to feel all hot and bothered immediately, I want to feel as though I need to rush into the bathroom stick a massive dildo into myself or better still wait it out squirming in my seat waiting to close so I can rush over and seat on his face with my "freshly washed poosy" funny, I was prob taking a crap when he sent the text. eeeeeewwwwww.

seriously they wanna fork me, (must be my very sexy behind...riight!) I don't wanna fork them and the one I wanna fork? don't wanna fork me. aint that funny?

SBR was fun, Princessa, Exschnerd, Fineboi, Wummie, Mz zynic, Charizad, the two mystery bloggers, Musco you sef wey save the day follow me dance, you didnt know what you were in for now did you? and the others I no mention (no vex) you guys made the trip worth my while.

It was fun coding, I wasn't a blogger I had just followed my friend there despite the fact that I had my boobs on display and I was wearing the same necklace from my profile pic, (tho chari guessed right in the beginning) it was fun when I finally asked princessa for my tshirt and she went bonkers, it was so so fun dancing with two left legged fine boi and screaming with mystery blogger, it was loads of fun. thank you guys.

"Wondering what your ringtone would sound like, your legs on my shoulders, me buried deep within you, hitting that spot, you going crazy from me hitting your womb, I cant stop thinking about taking you from the back, hitting that beautiful arse of yours, reaching forward to squeeze on those sexy titties, dayum Im hard!"

Wetin consain me?

why the hell is this boi polluttin my phone with rubbish?

I tire.

now if it was Jaja or Porter or Invisible (sorry thats my broda) or wavemasta's Straffe Okon or even My Tade, maybe then I for happy small but for now?

My feelings 'Far' you

I havent changed My mind...

how can I?

but I have changed my mind about what I say or in this case, write.

only God can save me now.